i'm so gonna get you.
i am feeling a mixture of disappointment and anger . somehow i cannot suppress the state of denial in me.i faced only 70% of reality. the other 30% still longs for you. maybe i'm too used to having you by my side.we've been together for a long time and attachment is kinda strong. you have put me under so much pressure and took me a rollercoaster life all this while. everybody i know has gotten theirs and i sincerely wish them happiness. perhaps i should have been awared of the situation long long time ago. damn it. why did i let you slip away from me ? envy is so not healthy but i really just wanna feel it for a moment.
it's so close yet so far. how am i suppose to deal with the future without you?thank god , my family is by my side. given my best but my best ain't good enough for you. why didn't you grant my wish ? i realised all my wrong doings and i shall not..no.MUST NOT repeat them anymore in the future. i'm so burning up for you the next time around. in a year's time , i will try to make you mine. just watch out. i'll change my lifestyle. be stronger. be determined. and prove you wrong for your actions against me. there's a part in me which strongly believes that i don't deserve you . totally. i am accepting it. anyways,i should be grateful to be healthy and alive right now at this very moment. forgive me and i shall turn over a new leaf.
uni life is about to start. let's make the next 3 years, the most important phase in my life , a fruitful and memorable one. sometimes, life would be more meaningful without you. i realised that there are more things to life than only you. aid will be on the way. god, be with me.
one love ya'all.
deh, kamsahamida.
11:46:00 AM
